Lessons in love

So, this is love?

Cleaning up your pee on my new green rug. Researching your dietary needs to make sure you don't have severe allergic reactions. Monitoring your daily exercise. Giving up my mid-week latte to save money for your new toys. Spending more money on your doggie sweatshirt than a sweatshirt for myself (five times its size). Giving up my lunch breaks to spend time with you. Waking up at 3 a.m. in a foot of snow to take you to the bathroom. Sacrificing my favorite pair of heels because of your annoying chewing habit. Resolving I'll never have a house free of pet hair. Planning my weekend around your walks and trips to the park. Teaching myself to sleep through your thundering snores. Unabashedly scraping your poop off the sidewalk in the presence of not-so-accepting humans.

Yes, if you have a dog, this is love. And according to pyschologist Suzanne B. Phillips, this type of love teaches us a lot about another kind of love: marriage. Pet owners often exhibit characteristics of "unconditional" love, accepting the faults of their pet while continuing to love them despite the trouble they cause. In Phillips' article on how pets can improve your relationships, she points out that pet owners often learn to greet, forgive, release grudges and accept the flaws of their pets, which may carry over to their relationships with a partner.

Although I'm not married and don't plan to be anytime soon, it's worthwhile taking note of the nature of my relationship with Linus. In past human relationships, I admittedly have been quick to judge and react negatively. If a boyfriend ruined my stuff or crossed me, it was absolutely his fault. When a long-term boyfriend picked me up for a date, let's just say my greetings have not always matched the extreme salutation I give Linus when he approaches me at the end of the day. With people you become comfortable with, it's easy to hold grudges,
lose interest and resist forgiveness.

I'll encourage all of my fellow obsessive dog owners to start looking at their spouse, partner or boyfriend more like their dog (if that makes sense). Strive to treat your human companion with the unconditional love he or she deserves. If he forgets to take the garbage out, maybe treat him as if the dog had an accident on the carpet. If he keeps you up with his snoring, maybe find it adorable and endearing rather than a wall between you and your slumber. If he steals the remote during Housewives, maybe be content cuddling and watching football for a while.

If he poops on your carpet... well, that's taking it too far. That may require some more serious counseling.